A new study from the University of California, Berkeley, has found that the way couples fight can predict their likelihood of divorce. The study, published in the journal _Psychological Science_, found that couples who engaged in "demand-withdraw" communication patterns were more likely to get divorced than those who used other conflict resolution strategies.

Demand-withdraw communication occurs when one partner makes demands of the other partner, who then withdraws or refuses to cooperate. This type of communication can create a negative cycle of conflict, in which both partners feel frustrated and angry.

The study analyzed data from over 1,000 married couples who were followed for an average of 15 years. The researchers found that couples who used demand-withdraw communication patterns were three times more likely to get divorced than those who used other communication strategies.

The study also found that demand-withdraw communication patterns were more common in couples who had low levels of relationship satisfaction. This suggests that demand-withdraw communication can be a sign of underlying problems in a marriage.

The researchers believe that demand-withdraw communication is a destructive communication pattern because it prevents couples from resolving conflict in a healthy way. When one partner makes demands, the other partner feels pressured to comply. This can lead to resentment and anger, which can eventually destroy the marriage.

The researchers suggest that couples who find themselves using demand-withdraw communication patterns should try to change their communication style. They recommend using "I" statements to express feelings, listening actively to each other, and avoiding criticism and blame.

By changing their communication style, couples can improve their relationship satisfaction and reduce their risk of divorce.

Here are some tips for avoiding demand-withdraw communication patterns:

* Use "I" statements to express feelings. When you talk to your partner about something that is bothering you, use "I" statements to express your feelings. For example, instead of saying, "You never listen to me," say, "I feel hurt when you don't listen to me."

* Listen actively to each other. When your partner is talking to you, make eye contact, nod your head, and let them know that you are listening. Don't interrupt, and don't start thinking about what you are going to say next.

* Avoid criticism and blame. When you are talking about a problem, avoid criticizing or blaming your partner. This will only make the situation worse. Instead, focus on finding a solution to the problem.

By following these tips, you can improve your communication style and reduce your risk of divorce.